Ain't No Brother
LSL - 012513/09:44
Ain't No BrotherWatching a panel discussion, on PBS, I just saw Cornell West refer to Newt Gingrich as “brother Newt.” My mouth dropped agape, in stunned disbelief. “Are you [deleted expletives] kidding me?!” I said aloud. “Newt Gingrich would shoot Cornell West in the back for $20, rob him, hock a loogie on his dead body, then try to take the money he spent on gas getting there as a tax write-off!” Man... something is up with that.
LSL - 012513/09:44
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Wasn't That FunnyWhen you call something funny, please know what funny is. Here's a tip: Funny means humorous. There are different kinds of funny, and different kinds of humor—no doubt. But, that fact alone doesn't leave one off the hook for calling a thing funny when it's obviously just an ill-informed, poorly-expressed, forced comparison of two barely-related ideas used to arrive at a bogus conclusion utterly lacking in humor. Duh.
LSL - 012113/09:48 Arrest Your MessUh, hey. Hey. HEEEY! Man. So—really—NO ONE is trying to DISARM you. Really. It's just NOT happening. NO ONE is trying to shred, destroy, circumvent, ignore, nullify or set aside ANY PART of the Constitution. REALLY. You dig? Also. Everyone who disagrees with YOU is NOT Hitler. Are you f*cking kidding me, with this sh*t? GET OVER YOUR DAMN SELVES! There’s WAY more going on than what’s in your basement... believe THAT.
LSL - 011613/23:49 Contrary to popular belief, or even promotion-fueled expectation, legitimate public debate is not always elevated or enhanced—and is sometimes hindered—by the open forum of online social media. For example, here's a question recently posted on Facebook: "If guns kill people, do spoons make people fat?" Obviously, this question supposes to equalize the intended uses and consequential dangers of a gun and a spoon—not really part of the larger gun-safety debate. But, if it can be answered, there needs to be an examination of the items being compared.
What is a gun? Basically, the gun was invented to be a weapon; designed for the sole purpose of discharging, or shooting, a projectile at very high rates of speed. Its function is to inflict the maximum possible amount of damage to the target at which the projectile is shot—in the above example, a person. When used as intended, a gun has no other innate function but that of a dangerous weapon. What is a spoon? Basically, the spoon was invented to be a tool; designed with a handle at one end, and a concave scoop at the other. Its purpose is to transfer material from place to place—in the above example, food to the human mouth. When used as intended, a spoon functions innately as an eating utensil, but can be used to perform other tasks, as well. So, on to the (so-called) debate. If guns kill people, do spoons make people fat? *SPOILER ALERT* The answer is, NO. However; that answer isn't useful for arriving at any relevant conclusions regarding the inferred comparative inertness of a gun and a spoon. This is because the question--itself—is a non-starter: it really can't be usefully answered. Drawing a comparison between guns and spoons is a false one, to begin with. Basically, there is no debate on the issue posed by the question. A gun can only be used as a deadly weapon because that's what a gun is inherently designed to be. A spoon is something that can be used to eat with and, sometimes, to fill a bowl with ice cream, or add soil to a potted plant. The point is, a spoon can be used to do things other than serve as an eating utensil because it wasn't designed to only be used for that purpose. In fact, aside from being comprised of similar materials, there is no useful comparison between a gun and a spoon, at all. The posing of such a question quickly betrays the intention, of the person asking it, to obscure or deflect scrutiny from the issue being inquired about. They're smokescreens, and nothing more. It's kind of like asking, "If guns kill people, do airplanes give people indigestion?" There are simply no useful answers to these types of absolutely asinine questions. Time spent trying to arrive at any is wasted... have a bowl of Rocky Road, instead. [= LSL - 011513/13:06 I'm totally one of those people who picks up cool and interesting things he finds. When I'm out walking, I "keep my eyes peeled," as my dad says, for stuff that might be laying about. I've been doing it since I was a kid. If one wants to find cool stuff, one has to at least be looking. I've developed a way of moving my gaze around my surroundings—ground, then bench, then gutter, smile at passer-by, then shiny thing, back to ground—that puts me in the path whatever stuff is there to find. Not everything I happen upon is worthy of keeping—not by a long-shot. As one can imagine, there's all manner of icky, sticky, and just plain untouchable stuff strewn around everywhere one goes. For example: On a recent walk to my sister's house, I saw three broken, but heavily used, crack pipes. To some, broken crack pipes laying on the ground might not seem notable. But, three of them, in the space of just several residential blocks, did strike me as a bit excessive. I joked to myself that maybe there had recently been a run of defective crack pipes coming out of the crack pipe factory. Some people just can't catch a break. PICTArt/2013/SMIG Back around Thanksgiving, while picking up some last minute items at the grocery store, I found this list. It looks to be written on the piece of cardboard that's left after all the slips of paper have been torn off the pad. It got my attention primarily because it was obviously someone's T-Day list, and I was curious about what this person's holiday meal might consist of. A closer inspection of it revealed a bit of human humor, to me. Someone with a steadier hand was wisely thinking ahead... and no holiday meal is complete without five pounds of Mandarin oranges. [= LSL - 011013/01:55 Over the weekend, I found one of those Magic 8-Balls. Remember those? You’d ask it a question, shake it a couple times, then turn it over and an answer, typed on the face of a multi-sided die and floating in blue liquid, would be showing through a little round window. This one was pretty beat up, and the answer-teller wasn't working. So, of course, I busted the thing open—not as easy as I thought it would be. Inside was a small container of blue liquid, which also holds the die that has all the answers on it. (I had to bust that open, too.) The rest of the inside space was empty. Some free advice, should you decide to do this: Don’t get the liquid on you. It stains blue, and doesn’t wash completely off. Plus, I don’t really know what the liquid is made of, and getting it on me was a little unsettling. The answer die is the coolest part of the find. Less an actual die, and more two pieces of plastic glued together to make the shape of a die, the inside is hollow. This way, I suspect, when the Magic 8-Ball is turned over, the die floats to the surface of the blue liquid, and reveals the answer to the question asked. What fun! I’m going to think of some cool stuff to do with the die. And, actually, getting one was on my “Things To Get” list. So: Thank you, Universe! Well. Probably more like: Thank you, clumsy homeless person. Gotta gives proper props, you know. Also. For all the time people have spent looking into the answer window, here’s what it’s always looked like from the Magic 8-Ball’s perspective. Yeah... you’re welcome. [= LSL - 010813/13:35
Straight And Stronger Course2013. Already. Wow. Last year seemed to scream right by. Where does time go? Some of it keeps on slipping into the future, or something. And that sounds pretty good. Time has proven itself quite hard to have much genuine control over, anyway. All our measurements of it are, really, more like observances. We say a minute is sixty seconds. Yeah. Time couldn't care less about those labels... we could learn from time. [=
LSL - 010613/15:40 |
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